Manage Job Loss

What should I do after losing my job?

How can I manage finances after a layoff?

How do I cope with stress after job loss?

How do I turn job loss into a new opportunity?

This guide is for you if you’re currently experiencing a layoff and need a cheat sheet to manage job loss – a DIY (“Do-It-Yourself”) resource with practical tips and strategies. This post is a follow-up to the Job Loss Phases article. It’s designed to help you navigate this situation with confidence and from the perspective of the capable, resourceful adult that you are. Just like steering a hot air balloon, managing job loss requires patience and isn’t quick – but it can be a transformative and rewarding journey.

These strategies may or may not work for you, but they’ve helped many others. Some of them have worked for me, my friends, and the people I’ve supported. Behind this guide are dozens of stories from dozens of people – stories that I cherish and now I’ve combined for you.

Drawing from these experiences, I’ve created clusters of dimensions that I believe are essential to address in the context of job loss:

How to Manage Job Loss

Manage Emotions
Manage Beliefs
Manage Relations
Manage Leaving
Manage Spending
Manage Your Business
Manage Income
Manage Energy
Manage Your Brand
Manage Job Seeking
Manage Interviews

Although I see a natural order to the areas to manage, there’s no harm if you jump straight to the one that appeals to you most. And if, by some lucky accident, you find one tip that gives you an “aha” moment? That’s much better than not starting to read. So, do the click – take the tiniest step to the section you like. You may think it doesn’t matter – that it’s a tiny click-step – but isn’t that what truly makes all the difference?

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.

Tao Te Ching

Manage Emotions

Why? Job loss may affect your mood and trigger intense emotions. Either you manage your emotions and choose the direction you want, or emotions will manage your life and you may end up in a working relationship you don’t want to be in. Suppressing emotions isn’t managing.

• Pause – stop doing, start being – and reconnect with your body. Don’t blindly send your job application everywhere, and avoid spiraling into negative thoughts of total disaster. Spending 30 seconds evaluating your internal world has one of the highest returns of investments, especially when it feels like you don’t have time for that. Stop and ask yourself these questions – give yourself time for the answers:
  • What emotions am I feeling right now?
  • What is my mood at this moment?
  • How is my body doing? Is my neck relaxed? Are my shoulders relaxed? Do I feel tension in my face?
  • How does my voice sound?
  • How is my breathing?
    This will help you stay connected with yourself and gain the clarity needed to manage other areas.
• Give yourself permission to feel ANY emotions you may be experiencing (as they are already there), and admit to yourself when there’s sadness, when there’s loss, when there’s grief. Many things change when you leave your company and colleagues; it’s natural to have emotions related to these changes. You don’t need to do anything with them – just live them through, let them be, so they can pass.
• Embrace vulnerability (check this: The Power of Vulnerability – Brené Brown TED Talk) – don’t pretend you’re fine if you’re not. Job loss can be a significant source of stress. Being in pain is okay, and it can help strengthen the relationships you have. Consider the challenge: it’s possible to be happy and sad, happy and depressed, happy and not smile. What, then, is true happiness?
• Clean up your surroundings – in one meditation temple I visited, there was a sentence I remembered, saying that if the surroundings are ordered, the mind becomes calm as well. There are many emotional benefits to bringing order to your apartment, so if you get that spark in your head, follow it.
• Look for opportunities to be proud of yourself – leave your job in a way that makes others envious, so they remember how you managed the situation. Inspire them to look at you and say, “You’re a true role model, someone who can walk the extra mile and lead the way.” Yes, this is your chance to show your courage and prove you’re in control.
• Consider mindfulness – practice it yourself or join an 8-week courses (I recommend the Oxford Mindfulness Centre, but many other institutions are likely fine too). If it’s too expensive, don’t give up – there are ways to benefit from many techniques you can learn by yourself from local mindfulness and meditation groups, as well as free online sources.
• Consider relaxation – I recommend the progressive muscle relaxation method developed by Dr. Edmund Jacobson. It’s well known and you can find free recordings to help you get started.
• Explore other coping activities that you feel most drawn to – be it prayer, engaging with nature or simply writing down your thoughts and feelings (journaling). All these and more, are available for free and can help you gain the clarity and energy needed for planning and taking control.
• Seek professional help – although it may not be cheap, a psychologist or therapist can help you cope with difficult emotions during crises and guide you out of the dark scenarios. Having a dedicated person to support you, with whom you can create a bond, is invaluable during tough times. Remember, a friend or family member offers a different kind of relationship.
• If you’re a “techy,” consider chatbots if you want to explore this area – perhaps AI can convince you of the value of interacting with a human therapist. (There are chatbots that implement Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy principles and have proven helpful in coping with emotions and unsupportive thinking patterns. Read more here: Mental Health Chatbots)
• At the very least, remember these three simple and proven strategies – some of the best “medicines” available (ever wondered why pharmaceutical companies don’t advertise them?):
  • Get outside into nature or play with you pet.
  • Increase physical activity (exercise more than usual)
  • Listen to music you love.

The list is definitely not exhaustive, and you can find many books in libraries and online. But all the books are worth less than any practice that you’ll actually… practice.

Manage Beliefs

Why? To create space in your head. Often, people are blocked by their limiting beliefs rather than external factors. Don’t let thoughts that you are not good enough to get this or that job stop you. Beliefs that once served you well might now need revisiting to prevent self-sabotage.

• Learn to observe your limiting, irrational beliefs in context of your situation and job seeking – which ones are these? Do any of these timeless examples sound familiar?

Albert Ellis’s 12 irrational beliefs

1. The idea that it is a dire necessity for an adult human being to be loved or approved by virtually every significant other person in his community.

2. The idea that one should be thoroughly competent, adequate, and achieving in all possible respects if one is to consider oneself worthwhile.

3. The idea that certain people are bad, wicked, or villainous and that they should be severely blamed and punished for their villainy.

4. The idea that it is awful and catastrophic when things are not the way one would very much like them to be.

5. The idea that it is awful and catastrophic when things are not the way one would very much like them to be.

6. The idea that if something is or may be dangerous or fearsome one should be terribly concerned about it and should keep dwelling on the possibility of its occurring.

7. The idea that it is easier to avoid than to face certain life difficulties and self-responsibilities.

8. The idea that one should be dependent on others and needs someone stronger than oneself on whom to rely.

9. The idea that one’s past history is an all-important determiner of one’s present behavior and that because something once strongly affected one’s life, it should indefinitely have a similar effect.

10. The idea that one should become quite upset over other people’s problems and disturbances.

11. The idea that there is invariably a right, precise, and perfect solution to human problems and that It is catastrophic if this perfect solution is not found.

12. The idea that you can give people (including yourself) a global rating as a human and that their general worth depends upon the goodness of their performances.

REBT Network

These irrational beliefs were identified by Albert Ellis, the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), a pioneering approach in cognitive behavior therapy (The Albert Ellis Institute).

• See how irrational beliefs can be disputed so you can apply it yourself: https://www.rebtnetwork.org/library/ideas.html
• If the word “therapy” discourages you, realize that managing beliefs has been known for centuries, and maybe you’ll find it more appealing if you explore the works of Stoic philosophers:

Stoic philosophers pointing to irrational beliefs

Men are disturbed not by things, but by the views they take of them. (Epictetus)

(…) things have no hold on the soul. (…) Disturbance comes only from within – from our own perceptions (Marcus Aurelius)

If you wish to improve, be content to appear clueless or stupid in extraneous matters. Don’t wish to seem knowledgeable. (Epictetus)

No man is more unhappy than he who never faces adversity, for he is not permitted to prove himself. (Seneca)

Choose not to be harmed – and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed – and you haven’t been. (Marcus Aurelius)

Remember that it is we who torment, we who make difficulties for ourselves – that is, our opinions do. (Epictetus)

The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way. (Marcus Aurelius)

• Use the five questions of healthy thinking from M. C. Maultsby’s “Rational Behavior Therapy” to evaluate your beliefs and plans right away:

Five Questions of Healthy Thinking

1. Is this belief based on facts?
2. Does this belief protect my life or health?
3. Does this belief help me achieve my short-term or long-term goals?
4. Does this belief help me avoid or resolve conflicts?
5. Does this belief allow me to feel the way I want to (without using drugs, television, alcohol, etc.)?

Healthy beliefs fulfill at least 3 questions.

• Recognize that your current situation is an opportunity. Many beliefs you held during your job were likely subconscious, influenced by society, family, friends, school, and media. Now, you may see them in daylight and make a conscious decision about which ones you want to keep, which to replace, and which ones to grow out of. REBT, RBT, CBT… just to begin with! There is a vast universe of tools and methods to play with beliefs (many of these are primarily called therapies as they are used in clinical applications, but don’t be fooled by this – these are applied in personal growth and support managers and top executives in improving their performance and organizational efficiency. Now, how does that sound?). So, these are the tools to apply now! If you wondered when these make sense, now is one of those opportunities.
• Explore books that inspire you to challenge your beliefs and expand your perspective. There are countless valuable options available. Visit your local library if you prefer borrowing over buying. I already mentioned Albert Ellis and the Stoics, but maybe you want something more recent? One that is recommended and easy to get is “Awaken The Giant Within” by Tony Robbins. The book is rich in various practical approaches to inspecting your beliefs, e.g., consider permanence (don’t think a job loss or feeling sad is permanent), pervasiveness (don’t think that a work-related problem ruins your whole life), and personal identification (how much are you defining who you are by the work you do? You are much more than just a worker!). Some people like one book but not another, so find the right one for you, and don’t force yourself to the “recommended” or best-selling ones. Just don’t reject a book because of any pre-assumptions or controversy about the author. Focus on the message, not the messenger.
• Consider coaching, philosophical counseling, or consulting a psychologist to explore your beliefs from fresh and engaging perspectives. You may start with the ones that cause you headaches and self-doubt, and notice how these beliefs can limit you in other areas of life. As a certified coach, I myself enjoy being the client as well (and supervision is embedded as a required part of professional coaching path I follow). Coaching sessions can help you clarify your goals, realize the sources of your motivations, and stay on the brighter side (coaching is not therapy, but coaching can support therapy). It can help you tap into your source of strength and energy. If you think it may be too expensive, you may look for people who have just graduated and offer free sessions or those who offer first session for free. You can then decide if you want to continue.
• Embrace curiosity – Many more job opportunities will appear if you look a little bit closer and replace the limiting belief of “impossible” with a softer one – “let’s check”. I’ve seen real-life examples where the “impossible” was overcome with “butterfly” effort. Don’t convince yourself something is impossible – stay open to possibilities and embrace a mindset of curiosity. To begin, allow yourself to NOT KNOW that.

Manage Relations

Remain a grown-up, an adult, capable person. Don’t use job loss to manipulate others or let them “babysit” you.

• Family support – or support your family – you’re not the only one affected! Take care of your family, and they will take care of you. The tricky part is to remain “adult” (see “Born to Win” by Muriel James) without harming relationships. Use I-statements, Nonviolent Communication (NVC), or other conversation templates. These work better if you manage emotions first:

I-statement template

When you… (a fact, not an interpretation!),
I feel… (a feeling, not a pseudo-feeling!).

Nonviolence Communication steps

(Prepare – Assume positive intentions)

Observations – What I observe?
(What would a camera register?)

Feelings – How I feel?
(Not an interpretation, not a thought.)

Needs – What I need/value?

Requests – What specific action would I like to be taken?
(Allow it to be accepted or rejected!)

Check if you can accept “no” without harming the relationship. This shows you’re using NVC effectively.

Notice, the NVC template works both ways: you may use it to share your message and for empathic listening.

Here you may download the feelings and needs inventory, which is useful not only for NVC or I-statements: https://www.cnvc.org/learn/what-is-nvc

• Be assertive – Assertiveness means not sacrificing yourself for others. Act when needed; don’t passively accept changes and hope they’re temporary. Every unspoken “no” will require more “no’s” later. Look for assertiveness workshops in your local community; mental health professionals and local support institutions may point you to the right place for such training.
• It’s easier together – Talk to others who have also left their jobs, perhaps even from the same company. Support each other and share job seeking challenges to gain helpful perspectives. Avoid “childish” behavior, like blaming others for being laid off or demanding help. Return to NVC steps in these moments, but don’t judge yourself for doing mistakes. Be grateful that you had the moment of awareness where you could spot that and change direction. It’s a sign you are managing it well.

Manage Leaving

Leaving the job and company is your chance to demonstrate professionalism and leave a mark – not everyone gets this opportunity!

• Clean-up and complete things – This is the time to be a true professional. Ensure everything on your desk is properly handled: find new owners for items, transfer knowledge and responsibilities, and onboard others to take over your tasks. This will not only leave a positive impression but will be helpful to the people who stay.
• Ask for references – Many companies review reference letters during the hiring process; in some countries, it’s standard practice. Why close these doors?
• Ask for feedback – Save feedback from your HR system; it offers insights into your strengths and areas for improvement.
• Ask for LinkedIn recommendations – It’s better to have recommendations than not. Share the direction you want to take so their recommendations align with your goals.
• Consider consulting a lawyer – You can negotiate the terms of your leaving and discover aspects you hadn’t considered. It may also provide insight into handling your next employment agreement.
• Do health checks before leaving – If you have a private healthcare package, use it to assess your health. A check-up can guide you on areas to focus on for your well-being.
• Check healthcare packages and life insurance for continuation – If you have these benefits, consider continuing them. Sometimes they’re more affordable than other options on the market.
• Check other benefits and due dates – If you have a prepaid company card or discounts at specific shops, check their validity so you don’t lose money or opportunities.
• Check buy-out options – Some companies let you buy devices (laptops, phones) at a fraction of their cost. You just need to ask.
• Write an email, and connect on social platforms – Stay connected – send invitations to people you value.

Manage Spending

Manage financial resources to extend your time buffer and find a job you want, not one you dislike.

• Know your “burning rate” – Calculate your expenses (daily, monthly, yearly) and include big upcoming costs like insurance (car, house, health, life), medical treatments, taxes, or travel.
• Think in terms of your time buffer – Evaluate spending based on how many days of your buffer it costs.
• Review investments for autorenewal – If you invest money regularly, consider pausing it to increase your financial buffer.
• Reassess long-term savings – While pensions are important, pausing contributions temporarily can extend your time buffer.
• Track regular payments – Be mindful of recurring payments and their consequences if unpaid. Evaluate their importance – you might find you don’t need some of them and that some can be postponed without any consequences.
• Reduce paid subscriptions – Review all small monthly costs like premium accounts, streaming services, donations, or e-book libraries. Do you really need all of them, or would you prefer more financial freedom?
• Rethink long-term plans – Postpone expensive trips, luxury gifts, and large purchases. For each, ask yourself how many days, weeks, or months it costs.
• Prioritize health while managing risk – Cutting healthcare expenses may increase risks without significant benefits. Ensure you’re registered for national healthcare services.

Manage Your Business

Reduce waste – focus on what matters to find the job you want.

• Realize you have work to do – But you’re not working? Wrong. Just because you’re not being paid doesn’t mean you’re not working.
• Realize you have a boss – But you’re not hired? Wrong. You are your own boss – managing your time and efforts every day.
• Realize your time is being paid – Manage your time as if you were your own boss. What is your cost per month, per day, per hour? This is how much you pay yourself every hour. Where does the money come from? From your pocket.
• Manage your business – What is the value of the activities you do every hour, day, or week? Treat it as an investment: your time creates future returns. Know your goals, ensure they’re worth it, and expect returns for your effort. If you don’t manage your “I-and-Myself Company,” then who does? Make it a company you can trust to handle the work the way you want it done – and achieve the goal.

Manage Income

Increase your time buffer for finding a new job by adding sources of income.

• Consider a short-term or part-time job as an additional source of income – A short-term job can ease your search for better opportunities.
• Sell unused items to earn money and restore order – Cleaning up not only adds money to your pocket but also helps bring order to your life. Chaos drains energy, and you need energy. Just make sure to keep a business mindset and balance it with other activities.
• File for unemployment – Realize that this is an option, and consider if and when you’d like to do it. This depends on the country, but it’s definitely worth checking. Including it in your plan can reduce stress and help you see that the “worst case” isn’t as bad as it may seem.
• Look for funds you may qualify for as unemployed – Check local programs for learning or starting a business.

Manage Energy

To work effectively, know what restores and drains your energy. Then you can optimize your job seeking efforts for best efficiency.

• Manage energy balance – Write down which activities you do during the day help you recover (add energy) and which ones drain your energy. Reflect on your overall balance.
• Set up healthy routines – Build routines balancing work, rest, and entertainment to sustain progress until you find a stable job. Use your list of energy-giving activities and integrate them into your routines.
• Plan in alignment with your energy level patterns – If you know you have more energy in the morning for tackling difficult tasks, plan accordingly. Don’t waste your peak energy moments on tasks requiring less effort. For more insights on managing energy, you may enjoy “The Way We’re Working Isn’t Working: The Four Forgotten Needs That Energize Great Performance” by Tony Schwartz.
• Limit chaos – Declutter your space and organize for order. Take the plunge and bring order to your desk, wardrobe, garage, and basement.
• Meet people – Spend time with people and on activities that help you restore your energy.
• Remember: Allow yourself to recover! The title of the prominent book by Edmund Jacobson emphasizes this even more strongly: “You Must Relax“.

Manage Your Brand

Control your career path and create the opportunities you want. Send the right signals to the world.

• What’s your personal brand? – Ask yourself: “I’m the only one who…” It may take a few iterations, before you’re satisfied, but just start this conversation with yourself. This is what makes you wonderfully unique and attractive.
• Reflect on your strengths and talents to build your brand with confidence. Personality tests can support authentic self-discovery. For more on strengths I recommend to check the resources around StrengthsFinder assessment – the assessment is paid, but you may still benefit from just reading the talent descriptions, which is free. Consider these assessments available at no monetary cost (I don’t say “free” because you pay with data and attention – money is only one of the valuable assets you have; don’t assume that money is the most valuable one):
  • 16 Personalities
  • DISC (offered by Tony Robbins)
  • and google for: Hartman Test, Enneagram Test.
• If you take any self-assessments, don’t take the results too seriously. Use them for fun with friends – ask them how accurate they think the results. You may also play “the opposite” – negate the statements about your results or explore how a completely different profile might fit you. You might even discover that you relate to all profiles and descriptions, at least a little bit.
• Assess your situation by performing a SWOT analysis:

SWOT Analysis

• What are my Strengths?
  (What am I good at? What are my advantages?)
• What can be my Weakness?
  (What may be my disadvantages?)
• What are the Opportunities?
  (What external opportunities can I leverage?)
• What are the Threats?
  (What external elements could cause trouble?)

• Use your SWOT results: demonstrate strengths, seize opportunities, address weaknesses, and mitigate risks. Consider certifications and online courses to showcase your qualifications (e.g. for agile path, read about How to Pass PSM I, PSPO I, and PSM II).
• Make your skills demonstrable – Do what you’d like to do at work. If you want to code, make an app, if you like to manage – organize an event, lead a project, or serve your community. Don’t make yourself a slave of money that works only if you’re get paid – “money is never a problem“. Show how well you can perform the work you want to get.
• Consider LinkedIn – If you plan to use LinkedIn, consider when to activate the LinkedIn Premium feature. It may be free for a trial period, so prepare ahead to maximize its potential during that time.
• Wondering about LinkedIn “Open to Work” option? Some people worry it puts them in bad light, while others don’t care and see it as an opportunity to signal their availability. Be aware it may confuse some people as they may misunderstand it and send you their resumes, hoping you have work for them. Enabling this option simply informs your network about your situation, allowing people to reach out – and some may genuinely help you find the work you want.
• Learn about personal branding – Look for books, workshops, and people who can help you build your personal brand, both offline and online.
• Find a coach or mentor to walk with you – There are many people who’ve received help in the past and are eager to pay if forward. They may feel a connection with you. But don’t expect them to pity you – at least, don’t expect that from me. I see you facing a great opportunity, and I enjoy seeing you grow beyond what you think is possible – even if you don’t enjoy it yet. You are writing a story you’ll one day tell your grandchildren.

Manage Job Seeking

Accelerate your future career opportunities.

Before You Apply

• Be clear with yourself what are you seeking – One strategy is “I don’t want to lose,” and another is “I want to win“. Both are valid, depending on you situation, but it’s good to know your current source of your motivation, as this will affect your decisions. What does it mean to you to “not lose,” and what does it mean to you “to win”?
• Account for the time to first salary in your time buffer – Understand that a job may start in two months after signing the contract, and your first salary might arrive in three months. Be conscious of the jobs you apply for and ensure they fit your budget and plans.
• Realize that there are many jobs you can do – Learn to evaluate various opportunities quickly – e.g., use some of the questions from the Job Evaluation Questions.

Joining the Job Market

• Have a CV/Resume ready and reviewed – Find a professional who works in the role you’re applying for and ask for feedback. At the very least, ask your friends or someone who can provide valuable hints. If you apply for multiple positions, ensure your CV is adapted accordingly.
• Reach out to a career center or career advisor – If you need help writing a CV/Resume. It should be possible to locate free offerings of such services, provided by the government or non-profits. Alternatively, you can reach out to a professional agency that specializes in job-seeking support – you’ll have to evaluate the return on such an investment.
• Build your network – Visit local meetups and events related to your field and companies you find interesting. When you’re there – talk to people. I repeat: talk to people. There’s no need to sell or promote yourself – be yourself and show genuine curiosity about your interests. If you aren’t curious, this is probably not the work you’d like to do, and you’re not in the right meeting!
• Consider partnering with a hiring agency, but choose partners wisely. Be very careful with the agreements you sign. You are valuable, and they know that – sometimes better than you do. Don’t waste your time with hiring agencies that don’t deserve it; remember, they get paid thanks to you.
• Look for recommendations – Do you have friends who can recommend you to the company you’re considering? Do you know people who work at places you find interesting? Reach out to them. They may help you figure out if it’s a place you’d like to be in, and may recommend you. The best recommendations come from people who have worked with you in the past – they know you and the company culture, so they can provide valuable insights.
• Apply consciously – Be clear why you are applying to a specific company and position. Prioritize quality over quantity when sending your applications.

Manage Interviews

Master effective meetings to make the most of the interviews.

• Be professional with every application – PREPARE, PREPARE, and PREPARE.
• Let your values guide you in evaluating the job opportunities – Know what you want and what you don’t want. First, identify your core values. Then, prepare a set of questions you will ask to assess how these values align with the company culture and the team.
• Remember that interviews are MUTUAL – It’s not just about a company hiring you; both YOU and the company must agree to the contract. It can be challenging to shift your perspective to see you are interviewing the company as well. Prepare for that!
• Do dry-run interviews – Your mentor, friend, or coach can help you with this. If the interview is in a foreign language, ensure you practice in that language.
• Be clear about your salary, expectations, and benefits – Learn what your must-haves (and must-not-haves) and nice-to-haves are, and be specific. Be ready to answer all questions with exact numbers, not ranges or “maybes”.
• Remember the simple wisdom – If you PREPARE, go though through an interview, and learn from your mistakes, you’ll improve. If you repeat this process enough, you’ll become an expert in interviews (even if that’s not the goal). That may lead you to the problem of making the right choice. My recommendation is to navigate by your core values, but the best decision ultimately lies in your hands.

Reflections

What does work mean to you? Is it a way to pay the bills, a tribute to life outside of work? Or perhaps it’s a vehicle for growth, a way to connect with others on a shared journey? Maybe it’s a way to contribute to the world in service to other people? Or is something else entirely? How you perceive work affects how you handle and manage job loss – whether you accept it as part of your plan or resist and fight against it. I hope these tips help you manage more comfortably and effectively, leading to the final chapter of landing your dream job – with a smile.

Lastly, I’m grateful to my friend Artur Fierka for his practical suggestions and feedback on the job loss posts I’ve written. I also want to thank the people who shared their job loss stories with me, as well as those I’ve been fortunate to observe and share experiences with in various roles and perspectives.

If you want to share your story or are looking for someone to walk alongside you through it, I’m happy to assist with an open mind, active listening, and open questions. Feel free to reach out.